More car stuff

Otherwise I will have to write about Aunt Zaytuni ... and I really want to kick her ass out over Kenya at 10,000 ft with a nice parachute.

WHAT DO STICKERS SAY
Generally, they say you feel the need to tell the world about yourself, "LOOK AT ME" .... So I thought I'd include a few local cars in this discussion:

Cambridge You have to have as many stickers on your car as you can reasonably fit. You need: a rainbow to prove you are diverse (or prefer your own sex); a dog sticker to show how earthy and animal friendly you are; an old "W sucks" to prove your left leaning tendencies; a Deval Patrick sticker for the coming election, even though he has achieved NO reform at the State House; a recycling sticker of some sort (hey, you need to recycle that car for a start); a legalize weed/pot sticker ... and just perhaps some mention of your kid's school affiliation. The car must be a soob or a 20 year old Volvo. Resident's parking stickers covering the glass of at least one window (the stickers apparently bond on a molecular level preventing the removal of last year's sticker).

Wellesley You need: an "ACK" ir "MV" sticker to prove that you can afford to leave that pestilential hole in the summer -- which calls into question why you really need a pool that gets used twice a year; a sticker bearing the private school affiliation of your spawn; a ski-sticker showing where you spend your winters; a sports sticker showing something banal and one of those goofy kids in a gymnastics or hockey pose with their name under it.  The vehicle must be a large SUV. The larger, the better.

Medford / Chelsea You need a Patriots sticker and some Red Sox stuff -- maybe a YOOOOUUUK sticker. And something to do with Papi.  If a pick-up, or a low riding chevy, you need a picture of Calvin (and Hobbes) peeing on something ... probably a Yankees hat.  With kids, you have the sports sticker. If a small sedan, maybe one of those "my kid is on the honor roll of Bishop Molestem High" ... like a Gerbil couldn't get on that honor roll. Then again, you never see those on pick-ups in that neighborhood....

Gloucester  Lobstah stickers ... maybe the favorite clam shack, maybe a sports sticker. More likely a bait and tackle shop sticker.

Lincoln / Amherst A Che Guevara sticker. A Bush sucks sticker. Something environmental, something pro gay or lesbian. Deval Patrick everywhere and Obama is the answer.  You have to remember that Amherst is the place that wants to accept Guantanamo residents as their own neighbors. I wish only that they would -- and then build a very big wall around the whole place.